In 2002 we ran away from Illinois where we were born and raised, and started a new life in SW Florida. This blog is about me (an eccentric old artist), ROM (my Real Old Man), Isabella (our neurotic Standard Poodle) and Emmy (our crazy snake killing Jack Russell Terrier). Oh- and the neighborhood old people. Life is good in Florida!


Friday, August 16, 2013

You're Ass Is Hanging Out!

No photos to go with this blog entry and once you've read it you'll be glad...
Our community has a landscape crew who do all the mowing for us, but we are responsible for all the detail work like edging and weed whacking,  For some reason people who do trimming work aren't very dependable. I've lost count of the number of trimmers we've gone through over the years.  They just suddenly disappear- sometimes even when we owe them money for the previous month. I don't know if they were thrown in jail, deported, on a drunk or hit the lottery.

Today when the trimming crew showed up, I hurried out to pay them for this month's work. We've had this crew for several months now and I'm hoping we can keep them for awhile. As I walked out the door my neighbor across the street was yelling something at me but I couldn't hear her over the weed whacker. As I walked up to the trimmer guy, I turned and made a motion to her indicating I couldn't hear her as I yelled "What?" At just that moment the guy shut the weed whacker off and everyone within six blocks probably heard her yell at the top of her lungs "You're ass is hanging out!"

At first it didn't sink in what she said and I hollered back "What? What's hanging out?" And as soon as I said that it hit me what she had said. Too late- she yelled back "Your ass! It's hanging out!" Sure enough, my dress was tucked up in the back of my panties. As I quickly turned to hide my ass from the trimmer, I handed him his money and walked backwards toward the door. My only thought was damn- I bet these trimmers never come back now! And I made a note to always check  after I potty to make sure my ass isn't hanging out.


  1. That is one of my nightmares. Once a couple (I ASSume) were walking a bit ahead of me into the grocery. Her dress was stuck in her pantyhose. I did not say anything. The dude was walking right behind and beside her... Maybe they were strangers. I feel so bad I kept quiet. I should have screamed it out like your neighbor so it wouldn't haunt my soul, kinda like your ass is haunting those trimmers. Now I always do an ass check.

    1. I will for sure be checking my ass in the mirror before venturing outside in the future

  2. I need you to do me a favor R.
    There is a blog called
    How I found it was a friend of mine who is in school decided to do a research paper on Christian Domestic Discipline.
    Hear it turns out that the couple who runs this blog are not Christians.
    I would like for you after reading to give your thoughts in a post.
    I am engaged, we are getting married in May 2014, I could not imagine my future husband spanking me. I also could not see you bending over for rom and getting ready for your punishment. Rotfl ma
    The site is called

    Here is a good place to start at:
    At the bottom of the posts you will see related posts. Oh boy.
    When she first showed me this I told her I didn't want to read that crap. When she explained what a control freak this man was, how he makes up his own rules and even gives his wife maintenance, reminder and put her through boot camp, it made me feel sad for her, but it works for them. Then that is when I saw the humor in it all. Lmao.
    Don't forget to see the - Quiet Spanking Implements and discipline while pregnant posts.

    1. Sorry, I don't follow links if I don't know the person the links came from. But I can assure you that even though I didn't follow the link, I can say I wouldn't like or find it funny. I had an abusive husband and lived in terror while I was with him. Lord help the man who ever raises his hand to me because I will never live in fear of a man again. If a man ever says he wants to "discipline" you, run for your life and never look back.

  3. There also is silent spankings rotflmao

  4. Make sure you read this one see alternative punishments. I can NOT believe the comments on the page

  5. Anon,
    WTF? I have a dirty mind and would never read something like that or put the link on my girl's -> ROH blog like that. I don't see how you call that funny either. To each it's own.

    You never cease to amaze us! Another hilarious story! Omg, I laughed so f'n hard. Love ya woman. Sorry for your experience w/ an asshole being abusive to you. So glad you have (my boyfriend I never met) ROM. I so want him to come on twitter. Can you imagine the fun we could have w/ him? I know.. Will NEVER happen.. Love when you blog!
    Amia xx

    1. Thanks, Amia. ROM used to tweet updates to his photo blog but I don't think he even does that anymore.

  6. The commenter about spanking cracked me up. I doubt anybody puts ROH in the corner, let alone would be dumb enough to try to spank her.

    I love this blog and always get a good laugh. You've actually made me look forward to getting older. I want to be you when I grow up- showing my ass and being able to laugh about it.

  7. Aging is like anything else- your attitude will determine how you experience it. But I have to say I've pleasantly surprised how much fun it has been so far.


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