In 2002 we ran away from Illinois where we were born and raised, and started a new life in SW Florida. This blog is about me (an eccentric old artist), ROM (my Real Old Man), Isabella (our neurotic Standard Poodle) and Emmy (our crazy snake killing Jack Russell Terrier). Oh- and the neighborhood old people. Life is good in Florida!


Tuesday, November 26, 2013

I'll Huff and I'll Puff and Blow Your House Down...

Sweet jezzuz, it's been windy the past two days! We've been having constant 25 mph wind and even stronger gusts. Isabella is so upset she hasn't crapped for days. The minute we walk outside her tail goes down, her eyes frantically dart around and she quickly pees, then immediately bolts back to the house dragging me behind. No reassurance registers in her panicked mind. She's convinced the world is coming to an end and she can't understand why no one else realizes it. When the wind finally stops and she decides it's safe to take a dump, I'm sure it will be a two bagger. 

Emmy on the other hand, is her happy go lucky self. Nothing fazes Emmy. Well, except for when someone pulls their shirt up over their face, then she goes crazy and tries to attack. And when I use my Sling Blade voice- totally pisses her off. But other than that, nothing riles her up. Thank gawd, because I don't think I could deal with two neurotic and fearful dogs. Emmy totally loves attention, even when it means getting dressed up in goofy costumes, including Christmas lights. Anything that makes us laugh, Emmy is all for it. And this led to the conversation I had with ROM last night....

Me: I need a Roomba 

ROM: What's a Roomba?

Me: A robotic vacuum cleaner

ROM: Why do you need a Roomba?

Me: People are posting hilarious videos of their pets riding around on Roombas. Emmy would love it.

ROM: What do they cost?

Me: I dunno. Several hundred dollars?

ROM: Can't you get a skateboard, tie a rope to it and pull her around?

Me: No! That would be detrimental to her self esteem when all the other kids have Roombas to ride 

ROM: Keep her off the internet and she'll never know 

And I had no come back to that... 

I still have photos to edit that I took a couple weeks ago at the Sarasota Chalk Art Festival. Hope to have them ready to post soon. 


  1. He's got a point! lol

  2. Happy Thanksgiving, ROH. Just wanted to tell you that I'm thankful for your blog. A friend sent me a link to your blog early this past summer and I've been a fan ever since. You'll never know how many bad days your blog has gotten me through. I'm in the middle of my second round of chemotherapy and some days your stories are the only thing that make me laugh. Your a special lady and so fucking funny! Thank you for being you.

    1. I hope you had a great Thanksgiving, Eileen. I'm so sorry you're going thru chemo but hope it's successful and you're soon feeling much better. You're so sweet and thoughtful to take the time to leave a such a kind comment. xoxo

  3. I say get Emmy a roomba but poor Isabella would be scared out of her wits I bet. Hope you and ROM had a nice Thanksgiving weekend- Julie

    1. You're right, Julie, Isabella would be terrified of a roomba-LOL

  4. I read on Twitter that you had lost a family member or someone close to you. I'm so sorry, sending you condolences. Hope you, ROM, Isabella & Emmy are ok.

    -Linda aka NoHoHousewife

  5. Where are you, lady? No Christmas lights photos? No recipes? No funny stories about the old people? No funny conversations between you and ROM? Come on, ROH, you're ruining my Christmas! Get yo ass to writing!


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