In 2002 we ran away from Illinois where we were born and raised, and started a new life in SW Florida. This blog is about me (an eccentric old artist), ROM (my Real Old Man), Isabella (our neurotic Standard Poodle) and Emmy (our crazy snake killing Jack Russell Terrier). Oh- and the neighborhood old people. Life is good in Florida!


Sunday, April 24, 2011

Gangs Take Over My Island on Easter

We are counting down the days until the spring tourists and snowbirds migrate back up north. This weekend and next weekend, Anna Maria Island and the beaches will be over flowing with visitors. And for some strange reason I don't understand, Easter Sunday is when the area gangs take over the beaches.  Most of the year the island is a sleepy peaceful place with an old Florida feel, home to upper class very well to do people but on Easter it's all gangsta! We locals know to stay home and avoid the beaches because it's going to be loud blaring music, a gathering of gangs, occasional shoot outs, and hordes of unsuspecting tourists that are unaware of what to expect on Easter weekends. In 1997 three people were shot. You can read the story here and here.

Knowing we'd be staying close to home this weekend, we took advantage of the beautiful weather and played on the island- no gangs in sight, just lots of sun burned tourists. We simply drove around with Jimmy Buffett playing on the stereo, enjoying the day...

Click all photos to enlarge to full size

We had to stop at some of our favorite boutiques and do some shopping. From this shopping center you can see the old Anna Maria City Pier, a fun place to fish with a great little cafe that serves the best grouper sandwiches. The very first day we moved here from Illinois,  Real Old Man and I sat on this pier drinking ice cold beer and feasting on a bucket of chilled peel and eat shrimp, giggling like kids in amazement that we'd made our dream come true. We were now living in paradise!  I don't think beer or shrimp ever tasted so good.

With our little beach car crammed full of bags, we returned home to unpack our pretties. We loaded up with ball caps, tee shorts, tank tops, flip flops and I even found a swim suit I likes- praise jezzuz! 

I don't carry purses, have no use for them. I need big roomy canvas bags to carry my cameras, Flip, sunglasses, sun screen, comb and brush... with extra room for a bag of shells I always seem to collect on the beach.  Like most woman are with designer purses, I am with canvas bags- I covet and collect them. I fell in love with these two blue totes and they had to come home with me.  

And I had to get some pretties for the house. When we moved down here, we only brought our personal belongings, keepsakes, a Hoosier Cabinet, and two dogs. I've told you how we gutted this house and are rebuilding the interior, and now we are gathering furnishings and decorative things. It's so much fun doing a little at a time. Instead of going on a shopping frenzy to decorate all at once, I prefer to gather pieces slowly, just buying things that I really love and have to have.

Remember the big glass fish we saw in the kitchen of the villa on Scary Island, and I showed you the one I have that's just like it in this entry? I found another smaller one in one of the shops last weekend and had to have it. And of course as soon as I saw the blue fish bowl and the white seahorse bowl they had to come with me. And tea towels!  I love tea towels with beach & ocean motifs. Who could resist the little tiled gecko and frog we found in the Sand Dollar Boutique. The first one I picked up, I dropped and broke. So I took it to the register and told the lady I would pay for it. She wouldn't hear of it! She kindly said "We don't do that here. Accidents happen". Wasn't that nice? That's what I love about this island- everyone is so laid back and peaceful. When we finally checked out I had added another unbroken gecko to my pile of things to pay for and as the sales lady rang up my purchases she made share I really wanted it and wasn't just buying it because I felt guilty about breaking the other one-LOL

Just one more week from tomorrow and Paradise is all ours again. Goodbye to all the old northerners that insist in driving in the left hand lane going as slow as they can only to suddenly hit the gas to cut across two lanes of traffic to turn right. Goodbye all you families from the north that fill our restaurants with screaming out of control little kids.  Hope you all had a great time and thanks for  pouring lots of money into our local economy, but it's now time to go home. Go on.... get...

Saturday, April 16, 2011

Should I Hang Basketballs From My Ears?

I started an experiment exactly one week ago today. Last Saturday I woke up with one of my earrings clutched in my hand. Evidently I pulled it off in my sleep. When I got up I put it on the nightstand as I made the bed and temporarily forgot about it. As I was doing my hair and makeup a bit later, I remembered the earring was missing and that's when I got the idea to test Real Old Man. I decided to not put the earring back on and see how long it would take him to notice. I have double piercings in each ear and for years have always wore gold hoops in both (unless we're going out). I was sure it would take him awhile to say anything because in the past I have gotten haircuts and changed my hair color without him noticing.

Since it's gotten so hot and humid lately in FL. I've been wearing my hair up everyday like I always do in the summer, so he can't use the excuse that my hair covered my ears. And I know he can see well because he just got new glasses.

So how long did it take him to notice the missing earring? He still hasn't! Now keep in mind, this is a man who can watch basketball and football games on TV and clearly see when a player has a measly toe over the line. But he can sit across the dinner table from me night after night and not notice I have an earring missing?

I have to give him due credit- there have been times he's come home from work and instantly noticed I had my clothes on backwards or inside out. Sometime when I'm in the middle of an art project, I jump out of bed so eager to get back into the studio that I throw my clothes on rather haphazardly. But come on- a whole week of not noticing a missing earring? 

If he reads this entry, I'm sure he'll say something along the line of  "I was going to mention it but then forgot." Or "I thought you were going for a new look". And of course I'm not going to believe him...

Unlike Real Old Man, I do notice things.... as I was walking back to the lanai the other day I noticed how summery and colorful it looks at the outside entrance. It's not a great photo because the lighting was wrong and I just took a quick shot before I went inside. The sight of blooming flowers and green thriving plants makes me so happy I could tinkle in my panties! 

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Really FOX? Nail Polish Causes Transgenderism?

The new J.Crew catalog has created quite a stir. Some are making a big frigging deal over a photo of a mother painting her son's toenails pink. I can't count the times I've seen little boys asking to have polish on their toenails as they watched mommy painting hers. They're little kids, for gawd's sake, and it has nothing to do with their future sexual identity.

It doesn't surprise me at all that an uptight psychiatrist, who is a contributor to Fox News totally over reacted to the photo. According to Dr. Keith Ablow MD the child's mother needs to start putting money away for the little boys future therapy needs. He describes the act of putting nail polish on a little boy as “psychological sterilization”. Where oh where does Fox find these "experts"!?! You can read read this doctor's asinine opinion on childhood nail polish here.

Monday, April 4, 2011

Funny thing Happened On My Way To Swim Season...

The Gulf water is warming up! When I checked yesterday it was 73 degrees. Tourists and snow birds might swim in cool water temps, but we year arounders wait for it to hit 80. A few more weeks before it's warm enough for me. I decided to try my suit on a couple of weeks ago to see how it fit before ordering a new one. Let's just say I was not at all happy with the way I looked in a it. In all honesty, few women in their mid 60's look sexy and hot in a swim suit, but that doesn't mean we have to have a big ol' belly filling out our suits or fat hanging out under our arms. I do envy those old women who continue to wear bikinis with bellies sticking out farther than their tatas, and half their ass spilling out of the bottoms. Or the other extreme, so thin and lacking in muscle tone their skin hangs in flaps. They have the attitude that if someone doesn't like the way they look, fuck 'em, they don't have to look. I, on the other hand, am way too vain, insecure and self conscious, so I stick to a one piece. And I sure as hell don't want my stomach sticking out farther than my tatas. Soooo....

I've started yet another early spring diet. Real Old Man decided to join me as he isn't real happy with his girth either. So a couple of weeks ago I purged the cupboards and fridge of all high calorie, high fat, and high carb foods. Then I went grocery shopping for Lean Cuisine and Healthy Choice frozen dinners, raw veggies, and Slim Fast which would be our supper every other night. We don't do anything half way- we either eat unhealthy fattening food with gusto (hence the diet every spring) or we seriously diet.

For breakfast I have half of mini whole grain bagel and a hard boiled egg, for lunch raw veggies and cheese, and for suppers we were to alternate every other night with frozen dinner or a Slim Fast. Actually the Lean Cuisine and Healthy Choice dinners taste okay, just very small portions.

Where I ran into trouble was with the Low Carb Slim Fast. The first night we were to have that for supper, I was busy with something so ROM drank his first. I asked him later how it was and all he said was "It was okay". I didn't get around to drinking mine until after he had gone to bed.
I shook the can, tore the top off, poured it in a glass and took a big gulp of it. Sweet jezzuz, that was the nastiest stuff I'd ever tasted. I can't even describe it- just horrid with a distinct and very disgusting after taste. I reminded myself swim suit was fast approaching, manned up and took another big swig of it. Oh my gawd, it just got worse. After getting half of it down my gag reflex kicked in and knew I would never be able to put another drop of that putrid stuff in my mouth again.  I dumped the rest it down the sink, washed the glass, and then spent the rest of the evening trying not to throw up. That taste stayed with me all night, even after brushing my teeth and scrubbing my tongue.

I had no idea how ROM had been able to drink that stuff and then say it was "okay". There was nothing okay about it. We had three cartons of that disgusting sludge sitting in the fridge and I knew I could never drink another drop of it. But damn, I didn't want to admit to ROM that I was such a wuzz I couldn't drink that crap. The following night was Lean Cuisine night, so I didn't have to 'fess up yet that I could never ever as long as I live drink that gawd awful concoction. We enjoyed our Lean Cuisine dinner and neither of us mentioned the Slim Fast.

When Slim Fast night came around again, I purposely made sure I was busy at supper time and told him to go ahead and have his Slim Fast, I'd have mine later. As soon as he went to bed, I opened a can and immediately poured it down the sink, putting the empty can in the trash so he'd be sure to see it. I was not going to admit I couldn't do the Slim Fast. I had a hard boiled egg and raw veggies instead. This went on for 5 Slim Fast nights until I started  feeling guilty, then I finally came clean and told him I had been pouring mine down the sink. He looked at me with shocked outrage and said "Damn you woman! I hate that shit and had to fight the urge to puke every time I drank one of those!". I asked him why in the hell he told me they were "okay" when I asked him about his first one.  He admitted he didn't want to be the one to break our diet plan and by gawd if I was sticking to it, so was he- even if it did make him want to puke. Neither of us have drank another Slim Fast since I made my confession. But we've stuck to our diet- he's lost 6 lbs. and I've lost 4. Why in the hell do men lose weight faster than women? The bastards...

And here are a few photos of what's blooming in my yard this week.... click photos to see full size.

Bird of Paradise