In 2002 we ran away from Illinois where we were born and raised, and started a new life in SW Florida. This blog is about me (an eccentric old artist), ROM (my Real Old Man), Isabella (our neurotic Standard Poodle) and Emmy (our crazy snake killing Jack Russell Terrier). Oh- and the neighborhood old people. Life is good in Florida!

_________________________________


Saturday, January 11, 2020

Now I Wait...

When I showed up yesterday morning at Manatee Memorial Hospital for the biopsy, I was told plans had been changed. The doctor performing the procedure decided not to biopsy the lesions on my spine and felt he could get the samples needed from the nodes in my neck. I was a bit apprehensive when I heard one of the techs say the nodes to be biopsied were right over my jugular vein. But after some thought about slowly dying in pain from cancer, dying quickly by bleeding out through my jugular didn't sound all that bad. Anyway, I didn't bleed out and it all went okay. The spine biopsy would have meant a spinal block and time in the recovery room, whereas the neck biopsy only meant numbing my neck and I was in and out in under 2 hours. And now I wait for the results- metastatic lung cancer or lymphoma?  

My emotions are all over the place. I seem to be either on the verge of hysteria or so numb and shut down that I can watch a TV show and have no recall of what it was about. And at times just sad. Still having intense pain in my back and shoulder. I can't sleep for more than 2 hours at a time before the pain makes me get up, so I'm constantly exhausted. 

I still haven't hooked up with a new primary care doctor. Other than the letter from Pinnacle Medical Care which arrived earlier this week informing me that Dr. Lopez was suddenly no longer working for them, I haven't heard anything from them regarding transferring me to another PC doctor.  Perhaps my pulmonary specialist, Dr. Burke, will have suggestions for a new PC doctor. Or maybe I don't need a primary care doctor, just an oncologist? I miss the good old days when your family doctor cared for you from cradle to grave. Now we have primary care doctors whose purpose seems to be merely referring you to various specialists. 

I started a sketchbook dedicated to documenting this cancer thing, but my creativity has dried up and left the building. Perhaps once this god awful pain is relieved, it will return. 

10 comments:

  1. One step at a time and deep breaths.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Are you saying they haven't given you anything for pain, yet?

    Do you need me to come down there? I'll be happy to do it. I have some experience in this doctors-full-of-shit stuff. I'm practically magic: I can strike terror in their hearts so fast they find themselves practicing good medicine in a nano-second. I'll bring hubs for a vacay, we'll stay in a hotel, & he can fish while I cast some spells on those docs. Just say the word, ROH, I'm there.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I have doubt you would be a formidable patients rights advocate!

      Delete
  3. Okay, in hindsight, don't let me scare you. I was exaggerating--well, you know me, trying to give you a giggle. I will be happy to show up to help if you need me. I can't bear to think of you in that kind of pain, so please ask someone to call your docs & get them on that pronto. They should have given you pain meds already. Much love.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. At this moment I no longer have a primary doctor and haven't yet been hooked up with an oncologist. Hopefully when I find a new PC doctor and/or oncologist, I'll get this pain dealt with. Love you, too, Dottie!

      Delete
    2. Go to the ER. Really. They can help you with that pain until Monday, when you can call your PC group & READ THEM THE RIOT ACT!

      [I'll do that last part for you, if you want me to.]

      Delete
  4. ROH have you gotten a medical marijuana card yet?? I know they have them in FLA. It might help and you should have opioids right now anyways for pain!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The medical marijuana regulations in Florida are a mess. Florida has banned ediables and smoking marijuana, and products that are available are often in short supply. But it's easy to obtain weed illegally, and though it helps take the edge off, it's no match for this level of pain.

      Delete
  5. I’m sending you many, many healing thoughts. You are not alone, please know that. ~Denise AKA Norse1965

    ReplyDelete

Talk To Me!